I think about God sometimes.

I think about God sometimes. I think about people. I think about the image of God in people. I think about how we all look different and I think about what that says about the face of God.

I think about what kind of person I am; What kind of person I am becoming. How much suffering it will take for me to reach my goals. Are my goals worthwhile?

I think about choice. The choices I make on a regular basis. Are they making me a better person?

I think about my death. What would people say about me at my funeral?
What do I want to give to others in this lifetime? What am I meant to give?

I think about the tensions I hold. Cultural tension. Identity tension. Spiritual tension. Political tension. Bodily tension. Creative tension. Tension everywhere. Tension is power.

I think about the woman I will love. Will I make her happy? Will our marriage be a good one? A hard one? a bad one?

I think about how I’ve always been thinking about my death.

I think about all the things I have learned and all the things I have unlearned.

I think about all the problems that will not be solved in this life.

I think about how helpless I am as a human being.

I think about the futility of all religion.

I think about the emptiness of the human condition and our struggle against it.

I think about the eternal silence of God who watches all.

I think about the words God has spoken.

I think about the endless class struggle. Just humans who want a better lot in life.
Some hungers more easily sated than others.

I think about the wealthy. I think about how they feel they deserve what they have amassed. I think about the people they exploited to get what they have. I think about how easy it would be to think that way if I were to become wealthy.

I think about race. Why we judge each other. Why we think we know better than another.

I think about aliens watching us.

I think about how everyone I see around me will be dead in 100 years.

I think about the monetary value of human flesh. How it is priceless and yet how easily it is sold and has always been sold.

I think about all the money I will make in my life collected into a single number. I think about how meaningless that number is.

I think about the cosmic history book that will be written about the human race if our planet is destroyed by nuclear war before we colonise other planets.

I think about my desires. The ones motivated by selfishness and the ones motivated by love.

I think about God. The eternal awareness of the universe. The eternal mother. Breathing in all of us. Watching with complete objectivity and complete compassion.

I think about life before the internet. How it was better. How it was worse.

I think about the lies people tell each other and the lies we tell ourselves.

I think about all the things I would do if I had an ounce more confidence.

I think about the beginning. I think about the end. I think about how far we are from either of those places.

I think about love.


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